Getty Image / Bobby Bank / Contributor
The road to sobriety has been long, arduous and marred with detours for comedian Artie Lange.
The 51-year-old can simply never get out of his own way. Lange, who has struggled with addiction for decades, tested positive for cocaine at a court appearance in December after a short stint in rehab that was intended to “save his life,” in his own words.
Artie, who is one of the only celebrities I feel an odd sense of personal connection to, lifted my spirits just before Thanksgiving with a tweet announcing his progress toward sobriety.
Guess who’s clean?!! Been clean 18 days! The rehab I’m at let me use my phone to check things. I still have more time here but I’m doing great. I’m humble. Not bragging. Just feel well. Tons of work ahead. Sunrise detox in Sterling, NJ helped save my life!!! They’re great!!
— Artie Lange (@artiequitter) November 21, 2018
The former Howard Stern Show legend evidently relapsed and is now entering a long-term drug treatment program, according to a tweet sent from his account that was signed by “TeamLange.”
https://twitter.com/artiequitter/status/1090760162493775873
According to Page Six, the tweet failed to mention that the comedian was arrested and booked in Essex County, N.J., on Wednesday night for possession of a controlled substance.
In June, Lange was spared prison time and sentenced to four years probation after State Police found the comedian with 81 decks of heroin on the Garden State Parkway in May 2017.
I hope all 7 girlfriends (I counted in my head. 7) who in the week before they left me said this verbatim ““Artie My mom always dreamed I’d marry a man w a working septum” see this pic & cry from guilt. Why? Never telling me I hid heroin in my Giants wool hat during a blackout pic.twitter.com/HXR2I8NIyJ
— Artie Lange (@artiequitter) January 5, 2019
Hopefully Artie will heed the advice of his comedy peers and find something to live for that isn’t snorting shit up his nose.
Until then, please enjoy this vintage clip of Artie coming out of the closet to George Takei.