
ABC Full House
As someone’s who’s spent time in a correctional facility, I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. Turns out, after maxing out a superset of push-ups, being locked in a steel cage is about as boring as a Danny Tanner sex tape.
Lori Loughlin, aka Aunt Becky, recently began her two-month prison sentence for her involvement in the college admissions scandal after reporting to the Federal Correctional Institution in Northern California.
Loughlin will reportedly spend her first two weeks in quarantine with no access to email or possibly even phone calls. Prison consultant Jennifer Myers claims that while Loughlin is allowed to “go out a little bit on the [recreation] yard for a few minutes,” she and other inmates are otherwise in lockdown.
I couldn’t help but think about how Full House would have handled such a dire situation, how the characters would have responded to learning that one of their own is a convicted felon.
While we’ll never know for sure, here is how I, an avid Full House superfan, suspect it would all go down.

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