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It’s Super Bowl Monday, the biggest Phone It In At Work day of the year, and you’re probably reading this from a bathroom stall. Your legs are starting to fall asleep as the aroma of halfway digested buffalo chicken dip is so toxic, you briefly consider consulting a medical professional.
One of my favorite pastimes to quell the post-Super Bowl blues is to delve down a Distraught Fan rabbit hole to remind myself that the only thing worse than my team not making it to the Super Bowl is my team laying an egg in it.
Ladies and gentlemen, please enjoy this Chiefs fan sucker punching the television that just projected his team’s monstrosity. And wait for the encore.
https://www.instagram.com/p/CLBCKaRFZLw/
Enchanting. performance.
As a palate cleanser, check out MTV reality star and seven-time Challenge winner Johnny Bananas celebrate Tom Brady’s seventh title with pyrotechnics.
Welcome to the club @TomBrady 🔥💍💍💍💍💍💍💍 🐐 🔥 #KingOfTheRings @Buccaneers #TampaBayBuccaneers #SuperBowlLV #TB12 #GOAT pic.twitter.com/mDwtRclqMK
— Johnny Bananas (@johnnybananas) February 8, 2021
Could there be any duller of a reaction to this? Dude brings a flamethrower in the living room and three girls are scrolling through TikTok while the tips of their hair starts smoking. Sheesh.
Ok, carry on with your marathon toilet sesh.